We all have at least one. Or, some of us unfortunate folk may have multiple sometime friends. Or, you maybe the sometime friend and don’t realize it. If you don’t know what a sometime friend is, let me explain with a series of scenarios (have you all caught on to the fact that i really like hypothetically situations)
- If your “friend” only calls you to go out somewhere, so you can drive
- If he/she doesn’t invite you out when she goes out with her/his other “friends”
- If he/she asks for odd favors at odd moments, and you help her out
- If you text your “friend” and don’t get a response until days later
- If you invite your “friend” to events and he says he is going to be there and then he no-shows
Let me make something clear. A sometime friend is still a friend. If you are in a crisis and you ask for help and your friend is not there to help you (sometime or not) then that is not your friend. Your sometime friend can be there “sometimes” but must always be there when there is a serious situation like break-ups, marriages, birthdays, etc.
So, those of you that have a sometime friend and are unhappy with that, you can only blame yourself. Part of a friendship (which is true of any relationship) is telling you friend what you need from him/her and what you can give. If your Sometime has repeatedly stood you up at events and you haven’t said anything to him/her then you are reinforcing the behavior. They are going to do it again and again. If you want behavior to stop you have to ask your friend to stop or end the friendship.
Or, you’re like me and enjoy the sometime friend. I am a “sometime loner” so I enjoy my company and like myself. I can’t be joined at the hip with another female, I tried it and it ended horrible because I just told her I didn’t want to be friends anymore. So for some people the “sometime friend” is a good deal.
Do you have a sometime friend? or, are you one? What are some other characteristic of the “sometime friend”?
T on E
